Welcome to the Border Barrels Beer Review System, or, BBBRS. This is a way to review each beer we’ve had on the podcast that is completely arbitrary and may or may not be a reflection of the beer itself.
The five things each beer is judged on is,
1. Is the beer as described, if the can says IPA, how much of an IPA is it, 5 being exactly spot on, 0 being as far from spot on as one can be.
2. How good is the can art, does it capture our imagination, does it sell itself with bright colours and big words to our simple minds. 5 meaning yes, we are completely entranced in it’s colours and fonts, 0 meaning it’s basically a can with nothing on it.
3. Blurb, what we are looking for here is words (ideally), hopefully words that describe the beer and also tickle our funny bone. 5, I now know what the beer is doing to my tastebuds, and also what the words are doing to my laugh capabilities. 0, it’s basically A Quiet Place, there’s no words (I hope that’s a good reference and there aren’t any words, that movie is way to scary for me to watch)
4. How does it hit my wallet, is it worth my hard earned cash. This one has two thought processes involved. The first part is pre-purchase, is the ABV high enough to be worth the money, what’s the ratio. The second part is post-taste, once you’ve had a go at the beer, is it worth it, are you happy with the purchase, and given the option, would you buy it again. Cheap beer gets a bit of a pass here. 5, value is through the roof. 0, it’s basically just a $10 can of water, pee flavoured water.
5. Untappd rating. For those that know Untappd, you rate your beer out of 5, now this is is completely crazy, as people familiar with Untappd know. Do I compare it to other beers in the style, or do I compare it to all other beers, no one knows, we just pick a number at random and see what happens. It’s a less exciting Powerball (and also without the $60 million reward)
Hopefully this helps you understand what the hell is going on for a certain portion of our totally unhinged, beer fuelled, ranting podcast. If not, send us your questions, we will answer them with some words that may or not may not help.